One Is the Loneliest Number


Three Dog Night sang it. Poets and writers have written of it. Movies and plays have portrayed it. The essential loneliness of our human existence and our yearning for connection is a primal force driving relationships, be it personal or religious. There is a delicacy and passion in those precious moments when we reach out to another person and there is a vivid response.


Most of us who have been circling the sun on this starship called Earth for more than a few revolutions have had that experience of Contact, when we encountered another who seems to resonate with similar feelings and ideas we hold dear, or at least is willing to validate our experience of the universe. If we are very fortunate, we find a partner to share our life, our hopes, our dreams. But even for those of us who are so blessed, there remains a yearning, a hunger for sharing parts of ourselves with other people, (or in some cases with other creatures of Nature – how else to explain our relationship to our pets?) with friends, or even with a sympathetic stranger. And thus blogs are born. Does anyone feel that the blogging phenomenon would continue to exist and grow were it not for the “comments” section attached to the end? True, many of us have kept diaries and journals long before the Internet was even a concept. It was a way of recording our thoughts and impressions for a later time, when memory of inciting events had long faded. It was also a way of organizing our ideas, examining our feelings, and that still holds true today.


We had a conversation yesterday regarding a get-together with people we knew, and how often the conversation in these gatherings would be so superficial and meaningless, we wondered why we bothered to speak at all. Yet, when we met some of these people one on one, we would talk about topics that mattered to us at some length. Blogging seems to fill that need, at least for some of us, to express thoughts and feelings that have meaning to us, and to seek a response from cyberspace from someone who could appreciate and offer a response to our point of view. Is this just innate insecurity on our part, a need for affirmation in what we hold true? Or is it just our primal need for contact, our way of huddling together against a vast cosmos in whose enormity our speck-like insignificance, can, for the moment, be ameliorated by the reassurance, “Yes, I hear you, and you are not alone.”

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12 Responses to Alone

  1. Yolanda says:

    I so understand this, totally. Thank you for the words.

  2. Yolanda says:

    Thank you so much. Healing for me begins after my mourning, for now I permit myself to mourn. I do see the beauty, but for now, I can only see beauty in darkness, for the light hurts me. Soon the healing will start. Your words is very soft:)thanks

  3. Audrey says:

    I believe people had the innate wanting to be loved and to feel loved. What people don\’t often realize or practice…is that you first have to love yourself. Be love."To give pleasure to a single heart by a single act is better than a thousand heads bowing in prayer." ~ Ghandi

  4. Marge says:

    Greetings, Jorje.First of all, thank you not only for visiting my journal and leaving a kind word or two, but for your return to double the blessing. I hope you will be a regular visitor to my little space and that we shall come to know each other as friends.When I first began the online journal, I stated in that entry that I was NOT doing it to influence people or to make friends; only to express my thoughts and tell my story. With the passage of time, I have found the kindly souls who come to call are sweet reminders of the human capacity for goodness. I have come to look forward to clicking on that comment button to learn who has come to visit and what they had to say to me. I feel as though lovely presents are being left for me to open when I get home from work at the end of the day. I don\’t know if you have gone into my archives, but I have been pretty open about my life and the experiences which have brought me to this place and time. In composing the journal, I have not only been able to tell the world about the person I am and the content of my heart, but I\’ve administered some powerful therapy for myself as well. A few visitors to the journal have mentioned the nearness of the words to their own lives and it means the world to me.That is some pretty powerful mojo.Although I haven\’t met my guests vis-a-vis, through my continued contact with some of them through IM, I\’ve come to consider them friends indeed. As far as influencing anyone, I hope to God I do. But only because my readers may feel open to concepts such as compassion, kindness, patience and the making and keeping of peace (in any form) and I am validating those things somehow. Regarding the essential lonliness of the human condition, I don\’t think it is necessarily a bad thing. How one reacts to the state is what determines its goodness or badness.I have had issues about this and observed much the same thing in others for most of my life. Some rise above the lonliness, some submerge and remain there. I had to make the decision to rise above it and am committed to it, but know I will falter from time to time. This is alright. It is a sweet sadness we must all bear. One of the biggest things a human being may do in a lifetime, is to reach out to others in friendship. There are so many variables inherent to socialization: the past experiences of people, values instilled by family, perceptions and beliefs held to be true. The first reaching out may be tentative: if it is greeted with openness, friendship may begin; if it is met otherwise, the spirit may be wounded. We are all at the mercy of each other. It behooves us to be merciful to one another.I enjoy what your journal has to say and believe you must be a kind-spirited soul. Your words are sane and articulate, contemporary and ancient.I shall return from time to time and wish you peace and love.Marge

  5. Unknown says:

    Hi, nice site !- you are very articulate, also the photographs are beautiful, did you take them all ?I\’ll stop by again when my brain is less frazzled and try and put down some of my (humble ;0) input on your thoughts and questions… they made me think.

  6. Marlene says:

    thanx for the comment on my space….llike your pix of chile , are you from there?marlene:)

  7. Mr_PU says:

    Nice photos! and I also enjoy your site. Thanks for visited mine.

  8. Deirdre says:

    I think it\’s a little of all you describe.I enjoy your blog very much, and I hope to read more of it. My internet connection is a bit of a problem at the moment, so I don\’t have much time to spend reading other people\’s spaces.

  9. SANDRA says:

    Dear Jorge, Once again I am impressed with the content of your site. You have a way with making us all think..reach inside ourselves and then…reach out. That is what this thing called blogging is to me and has been all along. I found that by letting my heart spill out upon the screen that I have found true healing in losing my growing in my stages of life. I have found a wonderful plus that at first I didn\’t realize would come about..and that is meeting so many people like you who are interesting, intellectual, kind, loving, and who have become my friends in my heart. I feel the real lesson of life has always been Love…Love of family…Love of friends…Love of Humanity..and Love of Life that connects us all.I will continue to visit you Jorge..and read your wonderful thought-provoking Blogs.

  10. Marie says:

    Thank you looking into our (fellow bloggers) hearts and putting into words what most of us feel about blogging. The comments left by fellow bloggers are like food for the soul – they console, validate and inspire. Furthermore, they kindle friendship and admiration for others. May I put a link to your blog in my space\’s "Interesting MSN Spaces" list? It will make it easier for me to come back to your space often.Hugs, Marie

  11. Lakota Clay says:

    I find your comments refreshingly literate and humorous. What a nice combination. Thanks for visiting my blog and letting me visit yours. Lakota

  12. Unknown says:

    I like that. 
    For me, blogging is a safe way to be sociable.  It gives me time to think before I have to speak.  I\’m not a really fast thinker. 
    But it also makes me think.  And I like that.  I think bloggers are just people who like to read and think. 
    Check you later. 

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