For those of you who haven’t noticed, I like to intermix the more serious topics that are on my mind with some levity, as Lord knows, we all need to lighten up at times. Here, then are
21 sentences that actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced during church services. I hope you get a chuckle out of them!
A LITTLE LAUGHTER!
1. The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
2. The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus."
3. Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don’t forget your husbands.
4. The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.
5. Don’t let worry kill you off – let the Church help.
6. Miss Mason sang "I will not pass this way again," giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
7. For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
8. Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
9. Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of Pastor Jack’s sermons.
10. Irving and Jessie were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
11. A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.
12. At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What Is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.
13. Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.
14. Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM – prayer and medication to follow.
15. The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
16. This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
17. Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done.
18. Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.
19. The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
20. Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
21. The Associate Minister unveiled the church’s new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge- now – Up Yours."