Cats and Dogs

It’s been a beautiful weekend in Southern California. Though the temperatures are in the low 80’s, the mountains are still covered to surprising degree with snow, while the usually barren, brown hillsides of the San Gabriel Mountains sport a spring green coat, thanks to the El Nino rainfall of recent months. Miki and I took advantage of this vernal gift to go hiking up one of the Mt. Baldy trails. There is a bubbling brook that shadows the trail, along with a sprinkling of majestic redwoods and a profusion of bird calls. Thanks to the melting snow pack, we were also blessed with spectacular waterfalls in place of the rivulets we more commonly are used to seeing. Surprisingly for such a magnificent day, we encountered only a small handful of other hikers, giving us the feeling of deep gratitude for what felt like a private audience with the majesty of nature. Clumps of wildflowers in full bloom added the finishing touches to our private Ansel Adams moment.

I confess – I have always been a dog person, while Miki adores cats. So, we have compromised. We currently have neither. (The truth is, we are gone a lot, and the surroundings of our home has sufficient numbers of wild predators such as coyotes, hawks and owls, that leaving animals outside is a danger to their survival, and neither of us wants to keep an animal caged up inside the house full time.) At any rate, the following piece sent by a friend tickled both our funny bones. I can only hope it does the same for you. Be well.
J.

PET DIARY

  DOG DIARY
  8:00 am – Dog food! My favorite  thing!
  9:30 am – A car ride! My favorite thing!
  9:40 am – A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
  10:30 am – Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
  12:00 PM – Lunch! My favorite thing!
  1:00 PM – Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
  3:00 PM – Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
  5:00 PM – Milk bones! My favorite thing!
  7:00 PM – Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
  8:00 PM – Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
  11:00 PM – Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
 
  CAT DIARY
  Day 983 of my captivity.
  My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
  They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.
  Although
I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must
eat something in order to keep up my strength.
  The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.
  In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
  Today
I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I
had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly
demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made
condescending comments about what a ‘good little hunter’ I am.
  Bastards!
  There
was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in
solitary confinement for the duration of the event.
  However, I could hear the noises and smell the food.
 I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of ‘allergies.’
 I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
  Today
I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try
this again tomorrow — but at the top of the stairs.
  I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.
  The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released – and seems to be more than willing to return.
 He is obviously retarded.

This entry was posted in Humor. Bookmark the permalink.

12 Responses to Cats and Dogs

  1. Stephen Craig says:

    Jorge, Here the afternoon temps were in the upper 50\’s but the sun was bright and had a nice walk. Then actually sat in the yard for an hour or so with a good book. I especially like reading the " CAT DIARY ", very funny indeed. In the art world I would think that the dog would be rather like a crafts person. Predictible, eager to please and satisfied with cranking out the same old stuff over and over again. The cat is akin to the artist with an aloof independent and somewhat mysterious being that is never predictable and ever curious always coming up with something new. Or so it seems. As ever be well, my friend

  2. J says:

    Sounds like a beautiful walk in nature Jorge. It is so refreshing at times to find such a moment. The dog and cat diarys capture the observed nature and presumed mind sets of out four legged friends perfectly! Thanks for sharing.

  3. Beth says:

    Your hike sounds wonderful And I enjoyed the pet diary.

  4. sweeti's says:

    I go for Miki..lolwell My Chica is spoiled like hell..and indeed she vomits on the carpet once a year..hahaand she keeps the mice alive and let them run in the house whenwe are not keeping an eye on her.she sleeps on the softest blankets ..she eats the best food.loland when the lady wants to go outside…she demans us to lift our ass….wellJorge.let the dogs come…she eats themfor breakfast..lolits a funny entry Jorge….i like it yahoooooooooooooospring is gone here for a whilewednesday snow againcya and enjoy the weekendLiving like cats and dogsMJ

  5. barbara says:

    Good of you to stop by my Space, Jorge. I too have been laxed in making posts on Spaces and I too make no excuses other than laziness. I have also migrated to Facebook because of its ease in posting small amounts of \’nothings\’. It is a good way to let others know I am still alive. Thanks for the positive note on my "Private Tea Party". One reads so much about these very vocal and many times angry groups. I think the journalists prefer to shadow these for their ease of finding them and anger seems to be more news worthy. I loved your lovely hike post. Once the weather here in Heidelberg stabilizes we will take a few hikes up the Heiligenberg (Holy Mountain) that overlooks the town and its river. The entire mountain is a preserve, dedicated to recreation. There is also a structure up there, an arena built by the Third Reich called the Thingstaette. It is now a gathering place for operas, high school graduations and musical festivals. Yes, time for getting the old bones up and moving.

  6. PJ says:

    Good Evening Jorge,Happy Spring to you as well. I have been remiss in my visiting; however, it\’s always great to hear from you. (This brings me back.) LOL. Thanks again my Ca. friend. Glad you enjoyed my photos. I have lots more just haven\’t uploaded them to the album yet. Until next time…Keep Smiling.~Paula~

  7. LORI says:

    Hello Jorge ~ I do so love those moments which you describe as witnessing or being presented the opportunity to a "private audience with the majesty of nature." It is a rare gift these days.And I have 5 cats so I guess I\’m a cat person these days. If I lived elsewhere though, I would be dog, pig, and horse person as well. I am most at ease and happy with animals and nature (and art).Too much human interaction makes me nervous. LOL. Sad, but true.Have a wonderful Easter Sunday.

  8. redvelvet says:

    You make me smile! 🙂

  9. Neora Chana says:

    Glad you had a nice break like that. I posted the same diary entries on my blog recently and got little response; now it\’ll get a broader exposure on your larger network for people to enjoy! Good!

  10. Jana says:

    Jorge, what a joke! 😀 love it! I am more dog person but I don\’t mind cats either. :)I am glad you enjoyed your hike with no so many people.Thank you for stopping by my site and not forgotten me. Yes, we had quite challenging winter and thankfully the bad rainy days are over as well and now we have real Spring, even with summer like feeling today. I don\’t know which part of California you live in but there was an earthquake, right? I hope it wasn\’t in your area.Be well, Jana.

  11. sweeti's says:

    Jorgei resolved my problemtx for ur advise Jorgewell the only one that will be hurt is the person thats been lied to..and thats gonna hurt …but as i always saya true friend needs to tell the truth even if it hurtsi believe in thati dont like to be in the middle of thisMJ

  12. Betty says:

    Hi Jorge,What a lovely description of nature. I\’d rather be in the presence of a redwood than in a church, anyday!I\’m sending the dog/cat comparison to everyone I know who is a cat person.Betty

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s