Dear Abby Stumpers

For those of us who need an injection of humor at this particular point in our lives, I offer the following: (for my non-American readers, Dear Abby was a popular syndicated advice column for many years in newspapers throughout the United States.)

Dear Abby Stumpers.
The following are actual letters that Abigail Van Buren (Dear Abby) admitted she was at a total loss to answer:

Dear Abby,
A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher, and the other is a social worker in her mid twenties .These two women go everywhere together, and I’ve never seen a man go into their apartment or come out. Do you think they could be Lebanese?

Dear Abby,
What can I do about all the sex, nudity, language and violence on my VCR?

Dear Abby,
I have a man I never could trust. He cheats so much I’m not even sure this baby I’m carrying is his.

Dear Abby,
I am a twenty-three-year-old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It’s getting expensive, and I think my boyfriend should share half the cost, but I don’t know him well enough to discuss money with him.

Dear Abby,
I suspected that my husband had been fooling around, and when I confronted him with the evidence he denied everything and said it would never happen again. Should I believe him?

Dear Abby,
Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own?

Dear Abby,
I joined the Navy to see the world. I’ve seen it. Now, how do I get out?

Dear Abby,
My forty-year-old son has been paying a psychiatrist $50.00 an hour every week for two-and-a-half years. He must be crazy.

Dear Abby,
Do you think it would be all right if I gave my doctor a little gift? I tried for years to get pregnant and couldn’t, and he did it.

Dear Abby,
My mother is mean and short-tempered. Do you think she is going through her mental pause?

Dear Abby,
You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex years ago and he IS a doctor. What now?  
This entry was posted in America, Humor, Thoughts & Musings and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Dear Abby Stumpers

  1. Corkywk says:

    Lol! For those who still believe a good education is overrated! Same people who believe the earth is flat, that the pandemic is fake, and that — a certain someone should be re-elected cause he’s done such a great job? Oh well, “Stupid is as stupid does!”

    • Corkywk says:

      On further thought as to my last comment, my generalization of ‘Stupid is a stupid does’, is grossly inappropriate and I humbly ask for its retraction. I apologize for its implications and acknowledge that I’m in no position to make such judgements on anyone in this manner. My apologies to all those in concern and to you Jorge as site author. Looks like anyone can have a D’oh moment. This was one of mine.

  2. Jorge Medico says:

    Retraction accepted. None of us is perfect.

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